3. Self-motivation. This involves
regulating your actions toward the pursuit of your goals, regardless of perceived
setbacks, adversity, discouragement and
frustrations. Self-motivation focuses on
positive short-, intermediate- and long-term accomplishments. It is about delaying any activities that promote short-term
gratification at the risk of slowing down
or halting activities that will get you to
your long-term goals.
The highly self-motivated advisor
knows which activities he needs to do
each day to reach daily, weekly, monthly,
quarterly and yearly goals, and he follows
through on those activities.
4. Being highly empathetic. You must
sense others’ needs, wants and feelings.
Empathy is a cornerstone of building
relationships, because true empathy takes
the other person’s perspective into account and leaves any possible conflict of
interest behind.
This business is a business of trust.
For prospects and clients to trust you,
they must first be convinced that you
understand what they are feeling. People
want to work with those they believe
understand them. The highly empathetic
advisor is more aware of his clients’ feelings and will convey that message, thus
building trust. He has honed his listening skills as well as his ability to detect
subtle social signals that indicate how the
prospect or client is feeling, and he is not
afraid to ask the client how he feels.
5. Understanding relationships under
management. Being able to manage
relationships by managing emotions in
others, reading social situations, communicating effectively and interacting with a
high level of confidence are all a part of
relationships under management.
The highly skilled relational advisor
uses these skills to resolve conflicts, promoting positive interactions and teamwork to lead clients toward their goals.
He can quickly diffuse client conflicts by
simply listening to their concerns, assessing their emotional state, expressing empathy, listening reflectively and assertively
responding to their request. In effect, the
advisor simply controls the emotional
climate by controlling his emotions and
managing the emotions of others.
You use emotional intelligence in your
business by understanding and increasing your emotional competencies. It is
not enough to be aware of emotional
competencies; you must also consciously
strive to increase your emotional self-awareness, manage your emotions, and
become self-motivated and highly empathetic to increase your relationships under
management. Master these emotional
competencies and you will surely build a
better business.
Daniel C. Finley is the president and co-found-er of Advisor Solutions, a professional coaching
and consulting firm for financial advisors.
Contact him at dan@advisorsolutionsinc.com
or at 715-262-2040.
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November 2009 | ADVISOR TODAY 59
